The Special Board

We have this big sandwich chalkboard that we write the specials on for lunch and dinner. When the special is over, we turn it around to face the kitchen and what customers see is the magical process of brewing Budweiser.

I can’t tell you how many people walk around the sign, literally knocking over the cashier, to see what the special is.


If we wanted you to read it, don’t you think it would be facing out. Or maybe you think we are as retarded as you are.

One night a brainiac asked me what the special was. I told her we no longer had a special. She said, “That board said…” Okay. First of all, if you read the sign, why did you have to ask and second, the board was propped up against the wall with the writing facing the wall. I know, because I put it there. When you had to drag the sign away from the wall, that should have been a clue we didn’t want you looking at it. Dumbass.

Recently, The Manager told me we have to keep our restroom cleaning supplies in the office since we don’t have a MSDS on them and if someone drank the bathroom cleaner, we would be in trouble. I know I gave him the blank look because he said, “Oh, you know we get ’em.” Shit yeah, I do. I see them every time I turn the special board around.

Reading the special board isn’t supposed to be an Olympic level obstacle course. Stop turning it into one.


4 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. DarcsFalcon
    Sep 09, 2009 @ 15:56:21

    Is there something in the water up there? You seem to be confronted regularly with a lot of people lacking brains.

    Well, it's epidemic I guess because there are a lot of people like that around here too.

    If the board's turned around, the special has been downed! Get with the program people!



  2. Holly
    Sep 09, 2009 @ 16:02:26

    You know, I ask myself that question a lot, but it's tourist season, which means there must be something in the water everywhere else.


  3. darcknyt
    Sep 09, 2009 @ 22:44:35

    Is there a dumbass-tourist pill somebody takes to be like this? I've never met anyone that dumb who actually displayed it.

    You're a magnet for 'em, Holl. Poor thing.


  4. Holly
    Sep 10, 2009 @ 10:30:03

    I know you guys think I make this stuff up, but really, I walk around shaking my head like I have Parkinson's. I think when people leave home their common sense stays to guard the house.


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