Strange Old Men

In every restaurant there are lonely old men who come in for coffee and show off their weird.  We don’t have many since we aren’t really a place to sit and drink coffee, but there are a few.

There’s a little old guy who comes in the restaurant for coffee about three or four days a week.  He was asked to stay out of one restaurant in town for touching the servers so now we have him.  He thinks it’s real funny to shake his coffee cup, as if he’s having withdrawls, just as I’m getting ready to pour.  Old dude.  You’re not going to think it’s so funny when you start that shaking shit some day when I’m not paying attention and you get your arm scalded.  Leave the damned cup alone.

Another old guy is related to Kayla and we make her wait on him because he’s such a creep.  She gets all butt hurt because we avoid him, but not long after he started coming in he asked her to explain to him how they were related.  That translates into ‘how wrong is it that I want to see you naked.’  He had this annoying habit of throwing his empty sugar packets on the floor either in the men’s room or under an empty table.  The only thing I can think of is someone, somewhere must have nagged him for using too much sugar so now he hides it by throwing the packets somewhere else.  He and I had to have a “Come to Jesus” meeting over this behaviour and he doesn’t do it anymore. 

There was an old guy who came in during the summer when we were wait listed and he would sit in a booth, usually one of mine, for well over an hour, drink coffee and BITCH about it.  “I hate this coffee, it is the worst I’ve ever tasted, it’s horrible” and on and on and on.  One night I had tables everywhere, I was running my ass off, and every time I walked by his table he complained.  He asked, “What kind of coffee is this?”  I snapped, “The same kind you bitch about every time you come in” and yanked his cup off the table.  Coffee Nazi:  No refills for you.  I haven’t seen him since.

Now that it’s winter and the tourists have gone, I’m afraid to see what kind of new strange old men will wander in.


3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. darcknyt
    Nov 07, 2009 @ 11:36:50

    The old guy hitting on his relative is … ick.

    Creeping ever closer to the "weird old guy" mark myself, I'm a little worried about how things are going to turn out for me. I know seniors don't always get the respect and care they deserve and need, but sometimes they're just … well, it makes me wonder what they were like when they were young, y'know?


  2. DarcsFalcon
    Nov 07, 2009 @ 17:16:28

    It must be old man season or something – you would NOT believe the email I got yesterday of an old man walking around outside, buck naked. And proud of it.


  3. Holly
    Nov 07, 2009 @ 21:24:55

    I worry about getting reaching the "crazy old lady" stage so I try to be kind to the elderly. I was always nice to my kids in the hope they would pick a good nursing home for me.


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