A Strange Bird

I think I waited on a serial killer today. 

The man was so seriously creepy he made my skin crawl and I had to force myself to go to his table.  He was ghostly white, as if he just got out of prison, and had short grey hair.  He ordered a hamburger steak, medium rare, and if that’s not proof of demented behaviour, I don’t know what is. 

When I forced myself to his table to see if his meal was okay, he looked at me like this:

I will eat your brains.
I said to Kayla, “When the guy at Table 2 pays, tell me if you think he’s a serial killer on the run.”  Kayla said he didn’t say a word to her when she asked if his meal was okay; just looked at her and nodded.  Yeah, he was too busy wondering what size clothes you wear.
Darren overheard us from the kitchen and he laughed at me.  I told him, “Shut up.  He knows where you live.”
As I was cleaning off his table, I looked out the window and saw him drive off in a big, white, unmarked panel van…all the better for transporting bodies across state lines.
I am not lying, I wouldn’t be the least bit shocked to see this dude on the national news.
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3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. darcknyt
    Nov 10, 2009 @ 23:27:38

    Oh, that serial killers stood out so well in public!

    …And I hate to tell you this, but I love me a good hamburger steak every once in a while. I don't like my hamburger below medium (don't ask me why, because I like my steak medium-rare), but I like 'em. Just a touch o' salt and pepper and they're delicious.

    Of course, I also believe hamburgers to be one of the great gifts God gave man. So maybe I'm serial killer material, too? šŸ™‚

    Reply

  2. Holly
    Nov 11, 2009 @ 14:41:45

    It wasn't the hamburger steak, it was that he ordered it medium rare. Everybody knows hamburger should be cooked to at least medium to kill the bacteria. He probably eats his victims raw so it doesn't matter.

    Reply

  3. DarcsFalcon
    Nov 11, 2009 @ 15:44:45

    He would creep me out too, especially with all I read about serial killers. *shudder* The van is a tip-off.

    But I hate well done meat, even hamburgers. Charred on the outside, but with some pink inside. I'm just weird like that.

    Reply

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