Things Left Behind

I am always amazed at the wide variety of stuff people leave behind in the restaurant. As it is now, not one of us ever needs to buy sunglasses, reading glasses, glasses cases, coats, scarves, gloves or hats ever again. I find cell phones, retainers, video games, car keys, sketch pads, kid’s shoes & socks, driver’s licenses, wallets and purses. How do these people get around without supervision?

Recently I decided that if people tip poorly, whatever I find on the table after they leave is MINE. Then I figured they would start leaving bratty children and since I can’t use them as kitchen slaves, they would be of no use to me.

No thanks.

Now, instead of chasing people down in the parking lot to return their misplaced items, they need to come back and get them if they tip less than 15%.  Yet another service I don’t offer for free.

A couple of nights ago a man and woman about my age came in for dinner.  I greeted them, got their drink order and as I was bringing their drinks out, the woman jumped up and yelled, “Oh my God!  I left my purse in the cart at Wal-Mart!”  Then she ran out in a panic.  I put the drinks on the table and the man looked at me and said, “No, she didn’t.”  HAHA! WTF?!

About 30 minutes went by and the guy sat calmly at the table and enjoyed his drink.  While he was outside smoking, the cashier got a call asking her to look at the table where the people were sitting for a purse.  Sure enough, the purse was under the table where the woman had put it.

This set me to wondering.  Does she commonly lose her purse or is the guy hiding it from her so he can have some quiet time?  Is he trying to make her think she’s losing her mind or has she already lost it? 

No matter what the case, we all had a good laugh about it.


6 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. DarcsFalcon
    Nov 18, 2009 @ 18:17:24

    LOLOL That’s so funny!

    The fact that he knew she hadn’t left it at Walmart is pretty telling, too.
    He said he put the cart away so he knew it wasn’t there. He probably figured it was in their car.

    I can believe she didn’t even bother looking under the table before running out the door.
    This is a topic for another day’s blog…the filthy places women put their purses. Blech.

    I doubt he’s gaslighting her – he just knows she’s a moron.
    I agree. She did seem a little ditzy to me.

    What a patient man!


  2. DarcKnyt
    Nov 18, 2009 @ 20:10:24

    Oh, I’m not convinced he’s not doing it on purpose. An easy victim, an easy mark, it’s hard to pass up.

    Still … hysterical. Frickin’ hysterical!

    What I find funny is two different reactions from a married couple. You think he’s doing it on purpose, Falcon doesn’t and thinks he’s a patient man for putting up with her moron behaviour. What I see here is an open license to play tricks on Falcon. HAHAHA!


  3. DarcsFalcon
    Nov 18, 2009 @ 21:23:38


    Not. A. Chance.


  4. Sherri
    Nov 19, 2009 @ 06:50:07

    Fal, a patient man? He’s an asshole! Why didn’t he holler at her before she drove all the way back to walmart? A patient man would have. What a dick.


    • DarcsFalcon
      Nov 19, 2009 @ 13:08:05

      LOL Nah, he’s just used to it by now. I’ve known this couple – not this particular one, but one just like them. Can you imagine? This guy’s probably gone through a similar situation every day for the last 20 years, whether it’s her purse, her keys, her checkbook, her lipstick, a bag of groceries, whatever. He just sits back while she runs around like a headless chicken. He was the one stranded at the restaurant, just waiting. He probably thought her purse was in the car.

      I think it’s funny how she called the restaurant from Walmart, but didn’t call Walmart from the restaurant. And didn’t even take a look around her first before bolting out. Flighty and impulsive. I bet she talks his ear off too. 😀

      HAHAHA! You completely nailed my impression of the couple. I have a feeling she does it a lot.


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