Death comes Creeping

Tonight I went to the little convenience store in town and I overheard a fireman heckling one of the highway department guys. “So, how many times did you drive by the dead guy in the truck last weekend?”

Silence while everyone did the open-mouthed stare, then a chorus of, “Ewww!” from everyone in line to check out.

I worry that this will be my fate…dead for days without anyone noticing. Sometimes people treat me as if I’m invisible, such as when I greet a table and they don’t even acknowedge I’m there. Or when people ram into me at Wal-Mart; no not my cart, me.

Recently, I had a dream that I was vacuuming my living room and I heard a noise behind me. I turned to see the Grim Reaper.

Hi there.

I said, “Shit” and went back to vacuuming, cussing my luck that I would die while doing something so mundane. Granted, vacuuming my carpet is a rare occurance, but it’s hardly glorious. I want to go out in a blaze of glory, something that will make people say, “Holy shit!” Passing peacefully in my sleep is acceptable, but certainly not in a truck beside the road or while cleaning my house.

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3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. DarcsFalcon
    Dec 09, 2009 @ 20:22:54

    Well, vacuuming is better than going like say … Elvis. Few fates could be worse than going while … going. Y’know? That’s been one of my fears since I was 13 and Elvis died. Anything but the crap of death! Please!

    HAHAHA! I forgot all about that. A very inglorious death, indeed.

    Reply

  2. DarcKnyt
    Dec 09, 2009 @ 20:50:17

    I’d rather be caught dead vacuuming than, say, the way David Carradine checked out. Now THAT’s humiliating.

    Oh, you guys are making me feel so much better. I forgot about David Carradine, too. For shame. He should have known better at his age.

    And Elvis is pretty bad but he’s gotten his mention. So it could be worse.

    Me? I’m hoping for that peacefully-in-my-sleep thing. Knowing God’s sense of humor, it’s not frickin’ likely.

    Peacefully in your sleep like your grandfather, not terrified and screaming like his passengers?

    Reply

  3. Sherri
    Dec 10, 2009 @ 06:48:40

    That’s a great dream, Holly. I like the “Oh, shit.”

    I’ve been thinking about David Carradine’s death. He probably didn’t even know he was dying, or he could have done something about it, right? So all he knows is he’s having a nice masturbatory experience and then drifts off to sleep. Embarrassing for us, notsomuch for him. Sounds like a pretty pleasant way to go, if you’re into that sort of thing. lol

    Yes, but he will be remembered less for his films and more as the guy who died while wanking. Eh, maybe his films weren’t all that memorable.

    Reply

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