Things I Want to Say #1

“Heh, heh, heh.  We left a big mess under the table.”

“Heh, heh, heh.  Don’t worry about it.  I licked your salad bar plates before I brought them to you.”


6 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Kate
    Mar 09, 2010 @ 22:52:32

    Calvin is my favourite child. But he lives on in the reruns. 🙂

    I wonder about folk who leave ginormous messes – what their homes must be like.

    I shudder to think what my customers’ houses look like. I figure some come out to make a mess because they can’t do it at home while others live in utter filth.

    Did you spit in the coffee as well? 😉

    I’m a licker, not a spitter. 😉


  2. DarcKnyt
    Mar 09, 2010 @ 23:15:16

    I’d say those things.

    Which is why you aren’t a waiter. 🙂

    And I bet you’re right; I bet most of the pig sty people have neat-as-a-pin houses which is why they’re pigs when they go out. Doesn’t that make good, solid sense to you? 😉

    Yes, but there are some you know just don’t know how to live any better.


  3. Sherri
    Mar 10, 2010 @ 06:11:26

    I agree with Knyt. They probably clean constantly at home, which is why they feel they deserve a break where they’re paying someone else to clean up after them. The question is, do they pay enough? I’m guessing no.

    These people left less than 10 percent so no. I don’t care what kind of mess customers want to leave as long as they are willing to pay for the clean up. Very few of them do though.


  4. Sparty Girl
    Mar 10, 2010 @ 16:52:48

    The only way in which I can relate to customers like that is when I had very small children. Sometimes you get a tired toddler and a preschooler and it’s all you can do to get them fed and get in and out with the minimum of fuss to the other patrons.

    HOWEVER, I always tipped really, really well if we made that big a mess. And I apologized. And I tried to avoid being in the situation, but sometimes it would just sneak up on me. Those days are past, so we’re very well behaved restaurant customers now.

    I understand things happen and part of being a server is cleaning up other peoples’ messes. However, she was completely unapologetic and a lousy tipper.

    I was dining out with some friends one night and I started tidying up the table. One person said, “It’s the server’s job to clean up the mess.” My answer was, “Yes it is, but you don’t have to be an ass about it.”


  5. DarcsFalcon
    Mar 10, 2010 @ 21:41:49

    Some people are so rude. Wow I say that a lot! Sometimes it can’t be helped that a mess is made, especially if you have small children and one of them spills, you know. In those cases, a very large generous tip should be left, along with a sincere verbal apology to the wait staff.

    I could never tell if I annoyed my servers or if they appreciated me, because I always seem to get a bit compulsive and start piling up the garbage – empty sweetener packets, cracker wrappers, straw wrappers – I’d collect that stuff and pile it someplace, like a soup bowl or something. Sometimes I felt like the server might have thought I was making some kind of statement, but really I was just trying to do some damage control and contain our mess.

    Any help with clean up is appreciated unless I’ve come to pre-bus & some obsessive/compulsive is picking up every miniscule scrap of paper off the table and piling it on the plate while I’m standing with an armload of plates waiting for her (always a her) to JUST GIVE ME THE DAMNED PLATE ALREADY!” I usually walk away when that happens.


  6. Still Waiting
    Jul 06, 2010 @ 16:35:27

    I’ve been reading backwards through your post and this had me laughing so hard that tears were streaming down my face and I was unable to type for several minutes. I tried.

    I love your blog!

    Why thank you!


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