Stupid questions. I’ve talked about them before, but now I’m talking about questions that are so stupid they are un-answerable.
Tonight a woman asked me, “Which is more mild, the beef or the turkey?” WTH?! What does that even mean? I wanted to yell, “You damn well know what each tastes like, so figure it out!” Or I wanted to put my head down and weep.
When someone asks me a question like that, I stare at them with my mouth dropped open, looking like I’m on work release from the state school. I know people think I’m being rude, but honestly, questions like this are so retarded they suck my IQ down to the low double digits. This is the point where I look at the clock to see how much more time is left on my shift and wonder how much more of this shit I can take before I snap someone’s neck.
Holy crap, people. Think before you let the words out of your mouth. Ask the question in your head a couple of times, or hell, try it out on your dinner partners, before you throw it out there like a spiked bola aimed at my brain.