For That, You Get Nothing

This has happened to me.

Wednesday nights are “All You Can Eat Beef Ribs!” and lately we have been screaming busy.  Since there are only two servers for that night, we run like sled dogs for the duration of our shift.

One Wednesday night, I had a full section of 11 tables, all at the same time.  I am not kidding, the entire restaurant filled up in less than ten minutes.  I did have one table leave just as everyone else arrived so I used that table to stack some prebused plates from other tables.  I was seriously in the weeds and I neither had the time to clean that table nor carry plates to the dish pit.

A couple seated across from the stacking table stopped me and asked if I would box up some of the beef bones for their dogs.  This is against our policy, but since I like animals more than I like most (okay, all) people, I said I would.  I immediately (even though I was busy as hell) went to the dish pit, got a bucket, filled it with rib bones and set it up by the cashier.  I know that the bones are too heavy for a box and I also know it’s disgusting to take someone’s leftovers out to a table.  Or at least I would be disgusted.

Meanwhile, every time I walked by this middle aged couple, the woman made a comment and giggled.  I thought they were both drunk as Cooter Brown so I ignored them.  When I noticed they were winding down with their meal, I quietly told them (remember, this is against our policy) that the bones were up by the cash register waiting for them.

The woman snapped, “No they aren’t.  I’m not stupid.  I can see the bones are still on that table and you didn’t box them up like I asked.”

Wow!  Really?!  I’m running my ass off here, yet I made time to do something nice for you and you’re copping an attitude with me?

“We have lots of bones so I put some in a bucket for you because they are too heavy for the boxes.  They are at the register since it’s unsanitary to bring them out here.”  I gave them their check, told them to ask the cashier for the bones, and wished them a nice night.  Then I moved over to the next table to clean it off.

“What a bitch,” I heard the woman say.  (Mocking) “It’s unsanitary to bring the bones out.  Don’t put your food with mine because it’s unsanitary.”

“I wonder if she heard us talking about her?” the guy asked.

Well, I hadn’t, but I’m listening now and I’m getting more pissed off by the second.

“She must have, otherwise she would have never got the bones for us like she said she would.”

Seriously?!  Fuck you.

I didn’t even bother finishing the table.  I stopped by the stacking table, grabbed the plates of bones, and took them to the dish pit.  Then I went to the register and asked Dani, who was covering for the cashier, to throw the bucket of bones in the trash and to tell the people who asked for them to get fucked.

Oh, imagine their surprise when they got to the register and Dani told them she threw the bones away.  The woman actually had the nerve to ask Dani to go get more.  Dani told her the dishwasher recently took the trash out and there weren’t any more. 

So here’s a tip:  When you ask someone to go out of their way for you, and they bend over backwards to please you, don’t be a jackass or you will get nothing in the end. 

Plus, in this case, their faces are forever in my memory and they will never get anything extra from me ever again.

Kindness pays off.

Assholery does not.

8 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Sparty Girl
    Nov 01, 2010 @ 14:22:10

    What jerks. Let me guess: they didn’t tip, either.

    They tipped about 10% which was more than I expected.


  2. skippymom
    Nov 01, 2010 @ 15:13:23

    Her attitude all over bones for her dog – my god I love my dogs too, but not to the point of being rude to a fellow human being.

    I hate to ask anyone for anything, so I would never ask such a thing to begin with. Plus, they didn’t pay for the ribs, which is why it is against our policy to give them out.

    And honestly – those bones aren’t exactly the best kind of thing to be giving her dogs – they splinter really easy [not like chicken, but….] so unless she has a couple of Chihuahuas that are going to gum them to death then she would’ve been back to sue you restaurant when her pups choked.

    Then again she probably does have a ChihooAhooA.

    These are the large beef bones and I give them to my big dogs. I take them away before they can start breaking them, though.


  3. Vodka and Ground Beef
    Nov 01, 2010 @ 15:30:49


    Using this word a HOLE lot from now on.

    I love that word along with ‘douchebaggery’.


  4. wigsf
    Nov 01, 2010 @ 15:31:32

    Kindness does pay off. I recently had a waiter at a restaurant who was very nice and kind to me. He got a nice tip for his niceness.

    I am not nice, but I am kind. I am amazed when people are neither.


  5. DarcKnyt
    Nov 01, 2010 @ 22:25:10

    WIGSF and I agree. 😉

    What jerks. And I agree with the person who said they’d sue if their damn dumb dogs choked to death on a bone from your restaurant. They seem like that kind of couple to me. So it probably all worked out for the best.

    It would have been nice if they had choked to death. See what I mean…I’m not nice.


  6. DarcsFalcon
    Nov 02, 2010 @ 00:21:33

    Good grief! What jerks! Seriously, WTF was their problem? Do something nice for people and get treated like that? Wow. I’m glad you had their bones tossed. Not even their bones, freeloaders!

    I was absolutely dumbfounded. I wonder if they notice how little they get out of life.

    Now I want beef ribs!

    They look pretty awesome. My beef allergy prevents me from sampling.


  7. TheIdiotSpeaketh
    Nov 02, 2010 @ 08:21:52

    Un-freaking-believable! Jerks and assholes is a major understatement! I still don’t know you do it…..

    Because luckily, not everyone is like this. They were Cody locals and I expect most of our locals to be dicks.


  8. Ahmnodt Heare
    Nov 02, 2010 @ 17:00:15

    Unfortunately, people like that are not limited to Cody. Fortunately, they are still a minority and I think they will dwindle as jobs created by our economy are limited to the service sector. People will learn how to treat people once their livelihood depends on it.

    I think more people should be in the service industry. We would be a kinder, gentler nation.


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