Why?

We have All You Can Eat nights three times a week.  Monday is spare ribs, Tuesday is chicken and Wednesday is beef ribs.  On those three nights I have to fight with two out of three tables regarding taking food to go.  The policy is all you can eat in the restaurant, not all you can eat for the next week.  The one table that doesn’t ask for a go box wants to share the all you can eat special.  Again, it’s all YOU can eat, not all you AND your family can eat for ten bucks.

If someone orders the All You Can Eat and only gets one plate, then we give go boxes.  If they eat until they are bulging and then order two more sets of meat, they can’t have a box.  The typical conversation goes like this:

People:  Could I get a box?

Me:  I’m sorry, we don’t give boxes for the All You Can Eat specials.

People:  What are you going to do with the food, throw it away?

Me:  Yes.  That is our policy.

People:  Well, that’s a waste.  You should give me a box anyway.

No, you shouldn’t try to take advantage of a ridiculously low priced meal by ordering more than you can possibly eat.

Of course, my tip suffers for this perceived lack of common sense.

Do these people try that shit at a Chinese buffet?  No.  You want to know why?  Because they would be told in broken English to go fuck themselves.

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5 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Katie
    Nov 16, 2010 @ 00:03:38

    Bahahaha! Hubby sitting next to me overheard the video and was laughing too. Thanks for sharing this! 🙂

    I love that video. The original was much funnier, but I can’t find it on youtube.

    Reply

  2. DarcsFalcon
    Nov 16, 2010 @ 00:50:48

    Don’t tell them you throw the food away, tell them you give the leftovers to the local homeless shelter or the local home for abused women and children. Guilt them! You’ll get bigger tips too I bet. 🙂

    Hmmm…that’s an idea.

    Reply

  3. wigsf
    Nov 16, 2010 @ 05:12:11

    “You been here four hours!”

    That’s a great bit.

    This is what I think about people who would attempt an All-You-Can-Eat anything. They’re all a bunch of fat SOBs.

    The last time I went to a Chinese buffet, there was a table of manatees gorging on whatever was in front of them. I swear to God, the chairs were weeping. This one manatee’s ass fat was engulfing the poor little chair.

    HAHAHAHAHA! Manatees. That’s great. And the visual on the weeping chair made my day.

    I get it. Some people are fat. But shit. Do something about it other than feed at a buffet. When your only exercise is getting up for seconds, thirds, fourths, fifths and so on, you have a problem.

    I refuse to eat where fat people are. I am not a thin person so if a bunch of fatties are hanging out around a buffet table, it’s only a matter of time before I look like them. I have turned and walked out of restaurants because of a herd of fatties.

    As for people who try to scam an All-You-Can-Eat thing, they can go fuck themselves.

    “Can I have a to go box?”
    Just like your class and public decency, we’re all out.
    Well, the only boxes we have come filled with used tampons. And honey, I’m riding the crimson wave tonight. You still want one?
    Sorry, the leftover food goes to charities to feed the truly needy, not the cheap and bitchy.
    We have a new delivery service. The food is already at your house. Don’t believe me? Go home.
    No habla Inglese.

    Oh, the things I wish I could say.

    Reply

  4. Sherri
    Nov 16, 2010 @ 06:30:09

    Do you know, I’d bet every person thinks he’s the only one doing it. Little does he know, if you catered to every cheap bastard out there you’d soon be out of business.

    After the 4th table asked me for a box, I snapped at the next person. I felt like I had been saying it all freaking night and lost my patience. Oops.

    Reply

  5. Ahmnodt Heare
    Nov 16, 2010 @ 08:18:10

    I never liked “All-You-Can-Eat” deals. I often feet guilty so I only have one serving. Then I feel ripped off for paying the all-you-can-eat price when I could have ordered off the menu for less.

    The All You Can Eat chicken is the same price as the menu, the spare ribs are 50 cents more and the beef ribs are only $10. Our All You Can Eat prices are dirt cheap, so it really pisses me off when people take advantage.

    Reply

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