Crosswords & Boredom

I'm trapped!

Winter is the time when the front of the house brushes off their vocabulary skills and does crossword puzzles between tables.  The rule is Dani and I get first go at the crossword.  Other servers and cashiers can look and suggest words, but they cannot fill them in unless one of us approves.  Cooks don’t even get to touch the puzzle.  That way we don’t get ‘pink’ when it should be ‘rosa’.  Since we do the puzzle in ink, someone could get stabbed over the wrong word.

Crossword puzzles are addicting.  Everybody wants to try the puzzles on Mondays and Tuesdays because those are the easiest.  By Wednesday, most everyone has given up.  On Friday, only Dani and I are still fighting our way through.  Saturday’s puzzles are so hard they make my brain leak and I have to resort to cheating or knifing someone for interrupting me. 

While our wallets are empty, our brains are full and we are learning new things.  Who knew another word for ‘jalopy’ was ‘crate’?  I know I didn’t.  Some of the clues and answers make me want to bang my head on the counter because, really, how on earth did the author make that leap?  If you do the same puzzles long enough the clues start repeating so you can catch on, but the first time.  Holy crap.  I want to stick my pen in my eye. 

I am sometimes amazed at how dumb my coworkers think I am, though.  Years ago when I was working at the Village Inn in Laramie, some woman asked if I knew a 5 letter word for boredom.  She was quite smug because she had filled in the puzzle and learned a new word.  Without hesitating I answered, “ennui’.  Her jaw dropped and she snapped, “Do you know how to spell it?”  Certainly:  onwee.

10 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. TheIdiotSpeaketh
    Dec 05, 2010 @ 20:27:20

    Ha ha! Crossword puzzles hurt my head….I rarely attempt anything that actually requires turning my brain on….. I save that energy for more useful pursuits like Soap Operas… 🙂

    They give me a headache too, but so does standing around in the waitstation watching myself go broke.


  2. DarcsFalcon
    Dec 06, 2010 @ 00:19:09

    I salute you, crossword queen. 🙂 You have more patience than I would.

    I have lots of time.


  3. wigsf
    Dec 06, 2010 @ 08:24:00

    Crossword puzzles. Sure, that’s kind of enjoyable, but that doesn’t really bring in the customers. After having read your blog, I don’t expect a crossword puzzle competition to help much in dredging up business.
    Maybe some of the waitresses should put on a little show between tables. That could help. Maybe Shakespeare. Maybe O’neill. Maybe some public displays of lesbian experimentation. That could really help business in the lonely winter months.

    I’m not much on the lesbian experimentation, but I’m all for bringing one of the cooks out front for a show. 😉


  4. tipsfortips
    Dec 06, 2010 @ 09:54:35

    We have a big fancy copy machine in the office. Part of the “unofficial” opening sidework is to sneak back and make copies of the crossword. This of course comes after you make coffee because if I come in and do not have a pot of coffee ready there will be hell to pay for some hapless rookie who has not seen this happen before. I have to be really bored to do one though. I broke myself of the addiction after being left with one letter missing between the french word for backscratcher and Adam’s eight descendent.

    HAHAHA! The other servers make copies of the Sudoku puzzle. I don’t mess with that because I hate numbers. When I am stuck on one letter, I just make it up.


  5. Onyx
    Dec 06, 2010 @ 09:56:25

    Jealous. I wish I could finish just one crossword puzzle. I’m terrible at them, the fiance and I try them all the time, and we usually just end up feeling like idiots by the end of it.

    So I stick with sudoku and word-finds.

    Crosswords are easy once you stop being intimidated by them. There’s a system just like any puzzle.


    • Fuck My Table
      Dec 06, 2010 @ 11:02:34


      Come on…you’re smart and know lots of words. Crosswords should be a snap for you.


      • Fuck My Table
        Dec 06, 2010 @ 13:51:11

        I may seem articulate at times, but I know that my vocabulary is lacking in many areas. Every time I attempt crosswords, I get about halfway through before I say, “Fuck this.”

        HAHAHA! Dani left the crossword out while she was on break and in 15 minutes I filled in all but 10 words. She hates when I do this on Mondays, but the Monday puzzle is so easy I can’t help myself.


  6. Ahmnodt Heare
    Dec 06, 2010 @ 18:11:06

    I am a numbers person.I do Sudoku all the time and have recently done more complex Sudoku puzzles.

    I would be more willing to do a crossword puzzle if one of the clues would be a seven letter word for “President”.

    I don’t mind the Sudoku as long as I can check my work as I go, otherwise there is a big fit in my immediate future when I realize I have two 6s in one column.


  7. mom
    Dec 06, 2010 @ 20:01:14

    I love Sudoku too, its just a little bit brain work….crossword….never

    I’m a crossword fanatic in the winter. I don’t have time for them in the summer.


  8. Nycgirl
    Dec 08, 2010 @ 16:59:56

    Awesome. I’m so braindead by the end of my work day that I can only handle the “In Touch” crossword puzzle, where the answer every week is “Eva Longoria Parker.”

    I don’t wait until the end of my shift otherwise the entire puzzle would be filled in with “fuckyou”.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: