There is a look women over the age of 20 shouldn’t try to rock. I’m talking about black lip liner. It’s a fine look when you’re 18 and having a goth night out, but when you are 50ish and trying to look sophisticated, it looks more like you’ve been sucking on a turd. Or that you’re a cheap hooker.
What’s worse is these women are always very haughty and talk down to me. I can’t bear to look at them. I want to tell them to go fix their fucking make up and pull the stick out of their ass. I might be just a waitress, but I damn well know how to apply lipstick and I know to reapply before all that’s left is the lip liner.
When my son was young…okay, he was a teenager…he couldn’t eat anything without having food all around his mouth. We would leave the car, I would look at him and his face would be clean, but somehow by the time we got into the store he would have a ring of food around his mouth. I don’t know if he was eating stuff he found in the parking lot or what. My daughter and I started calling him “Crap Face” thinking if we embarrassed him enough, he’d clean his face.
Every time one of these women with the bad lip liner finds her way into my section it takes everything in my power not to point and yell, “Crap face! Crap face!”
I’ll bet that would really screw my tip.