Things That Make You Say, “Blech!”

A coworker and I were discussing things that gross us out beyond belief.  For her it is wet hair; hair in the shower or hair left on the sink.  I have a list:

  1. Unflushed toilets.  I will NOT use a toilet that has not been flushed.  If I go into a stall and see anything other than clean water I will shriek and flee.  And no, I will not flush the toilet.  I’ve been known to send coworkers in the restroom to flush a toilet.
  2. Porta-Potties or outdoor toilets.  No freaking way.  I will pee my pants before I go in one.  No. No. No.
  3. Anything which makes my hands sticky.  If someone hands me a Pepsi out a drive thru window and I can see Pepsi on the side of the cup, I will flat freak out.  They have to wipe it off or I will drive away.
  4. Not being able to wash my hands.  If you want to see me pull a Rainman, take me somewhere without running water or hand wipies.
  5. Unsafe food handling.  If someone invites me over for dinner and I see them doing something which may result in a good case of salmonella, I’ll politely say something and if it doesn’t change, I’ll either flee or faint.  Don’t play with eggs, chicken or fish without anti-bacterial soap and/or bleach.
  6. Blood, snot, or any other bodily secretions of strangers.  People who blow their nose in a napkin at a table and leave it for me to clean up have my never ending hate.  That’s just gross.  People who have a bloody nose and refuse to leave the table should be shot.  I’ve followed people to the door and made them clean up their bloody napkins.
  7. Pubic hairs on/in the urinal.  It’s called a manscape.  Look into one.

  Then there are the things which make me uneasy:

  1. People touching my stuff.  Self checkout was invented for people like me.  I can’t stand a checker to touch any of my purchases.  I refuse to go to stores without self checkout and if one isn’t available, I stand with my teeth clenched, listening to the voices screaming in my head all during the process.
  2. People touching me.  I don’t like it.  Don’t do it.
  3. Sharing forks, spoons, or straws.  Unless I’ve swapped spit with you or gave birth to you, get your own damned utensil.   
  4. Things being out of place.  Specifically, the caddies on the table.  When some kid gleefully rips a caddy apart, I’m usually at the end of the table with a look of horror on my face while the voices scream in my head.  If more parents knew this, they would take little Johnny or Suzie and get the hell out of the restaurant.
  5. Shaking hands.  Sorry, I won’t do it.  I’ll wave at you, but if you extend your hand I’m going to back up and run away.

So, dear readers, what about you?  What are the things which gross you out to no end?  What are the things which make you wish you were somewhere else?

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23 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. The Snide Server
    Dec 23, 2010 @ 22:37:58

    I once had a lady use money from between her breasts to pay me for her meal. She even had the sheer nerve to ask me for change. The worse part? The money was wet from residing between her breasts all evening.

    I just about gagged.

    NO EFFING WAY! I would not have touched it. Never. Well, unless I could have given her change from the crack of my ass.

    Reply

    • Bunny
      Dec 24, 2010 @ 17:38:01

      OMG…I once saw a woman paying at the grocery store, on a hot summer day, with money she was literally digging out from under her boobs in her bra while the cashier waited looking as if he may vomit. It was so gross.

      Who does that?! I’ve heard money is covered in cocaine and feces. I don’t want either touching my lady parts. Barf.

      Reply

  2. thelifeofjamie
    Dec 23, 2010 @ 22:39:00

    Where do I start? The bathroom thing for sure. I can’t stand it when people smell their socks to see if they are clean or dirty- when in doubt- IT’S DIRTY!!! (I went to a baby shower in a bar (yes a bar) with my husband and I went to use the can and I wouldn’t! It was brunch time and the bathrooms were so disgusting that I preferred to go at the grocery store than in the restaurant- my husband was shocked!). I used to have a female roommate who dripped on the toilet seat- that always bothered me, and hairballs that aren’t mine. I hate being somewhere and a giant hairball goes rolling by like tumbleweed!

    When I was in college I got stuck sitting next to a woman who always took her shoes off and picked her feet. She actually plopped her shoe on my desk. I brought the class to a halt when I jumped up, tipped everything over and fled the room.

    Reply

    • Summn
      Jan 06, 2011 @ 12:30:41

      two stories re socks:
      I work in large construction projects, and the lunchrooms have those foldable tables that seat 3 per side. I was sitting there with random strangers on a newish gig, and I was laying out all my sandwich stuff: chicken, romaine, red pepper & avocado & all sorts of stuff. So once I’d unwrapped everything and was starting to assemble it, I looked up and the guy sitting on the opposite side and to the left had put his feet up on the chair in front of me. He’d taken off his workboots, and was using his backpack as padding so these nasty socks were up at tabletop level, a foot from my beautiful food!! Needless to say, I did not remain!

      Second tale: I married a guy with nearly-grown kids, so I wasn’t expected to adopt them, and since they live 2 provinces away, I wasn’t expected to even hang out with them (yay!) but one day we were driving, with my hubby at the wheel, me shotgun, and his 17yr old boy in the back. I saw something out the corner of my eye and turned my head. It was the boy’s SOCK, being spun around like a helicopter blade! What was up, I inquired. He said he was drying out his socks because they were sweaty and the moisture would aggravate his eczema. We were only about 20 min from the house- he couldn’t wait? He had to evaporate his foot sweat in an enclosed car, by waving his socks inches from my head?! And his dad didn’t even scold him, because he’s not easily grossed out.

      Reply

    • Hira Animfefte
      Jan 22, 2011 @ 18:16:37

      I used to work at [Bookstore Chain]…about a decade ago or so. Anyhow, I had a coworker who would always show up for an open shift (where we had an hour or so with no customers to clean up the store, restock, etc.) in a wifebeater and flip-flops.

      When the store actually opened for customers he’d put on an actual t-shirt, but the flip-flops (which were on their last few centimeters of wear) he would take off when standing behind the register. I’d be at the next register grossed out. I do not want to look at my coworker’s bare feet, or stand where they’ve been. Ew.

      The wifebeaters were not endearing either.

      Oh barf.

      Reply

  3. DarcsFalcon
    Dec 23, 2010 @ 23:10:17

    Snow.

    I can take the weather until it gets down to about the mid 20s. Throw in wind chills and I’m a basket case. Also, when the temps get up into the 80s and 90s and then have that awful high humidity that kills people and I want to scream and run away.

    And a few of the things you mentioned as well. Plus, a few assorted people.

    I think that about covers it! LOL

    I hope you have a wonderful Christmas hon. 🙂 I’d hug you but, you know, you don’t like that touching thing. 😉 If you change your mind, let me know. I swear, between you and WIGSF, you’re putting me into hug-withdrawal.

    I plan to have a wonderful Christmas and I hope you do too! I take hugs from people I know and like, just not from strangers.

    Reply

    • Summn
      Jan 06, 2011 @ 12:16:25

      I’m with you on the heat issue! I feel nauseaus, faint, and sweaty… and then someone will come along & say “Aren’t you just LOVING this great weather?!”

      Reply

  4. Fuck My Table
    Dec 23, 2010 @ 23:57:08

    Other people’s bodily secretions. I can handle mine, and my husband’s (for the most part) but if I even THINK anyone’s spit, snot, vomit, or worse is going to touch me, I will scream. (See one of my blog’s first posts about dental floss…EW!)

    Also, I hate it when certain fabric rubs on my fingers the wrong way. Sometimes it’s the texture; other times it’s the fact that my chewed fingernails scrape the fabric and catch little fibers. Anyway, whatever it is makes me want to curl up in a ball and cry.

    I hate when my fingernails touch newspaper. Ugh. I almost need to shower when it happens.

    Reply

  5. wigsf
    Dec 24, 2010 @ 05:11:19

    Here’s some things that make me gag:

    – old and rotting vegetables at the bottom of the sink after doing the dishes
    – smelly cheese
    – saggy old lady parts

    Stop looking at saggy old lady parts and you won’t gag. 🙂

    Reply

  6. An Educated Server
    Dec 24, 2010 @ 07:04:08

    I’m definitely with you on the bathroom thing. It amazes me how grown women can go into a public restroom and not flush. I’m not asking you to scrub the toilets after each use, just flush. I assume they flush at home, so why not in public? It amazes me. It also bothers me when women come out of the restroom and tell me things about it (like there’s paper on the floor or it smells bad). Umm, I don’t really care. I always smile and act like I’m going to tell a manager. I really don’t get paid to care about such things (is that a bad way to think?).

    I really couldn’t give a shit less about what’s going on in the restroom until closing time when I have to clean it. I do the same thing when people complain about the condition of the restrooms. I tell them I will get someone right on it and I promptly forget about it. I’m paid to serve food, not monitor the restrooms.

    Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment. I’ll be checking out your blog soon.

    Reply

  7. Ahmnodt Heare
    Dec 24, 2010 @ 08:35:56

    Food handling (only I am more extreme) I won’t cook until my hands are washed or sanitized. Cutting meat, poultry, and lettuce on the same cutting board is also a huge no-no.

    Cross contamination is a huge issue with me. Anything which might send me to the ER is cause for alarm.

    Other people touching my clothes at the laundromat freaks me out. If it’s not yours, don’t touch it!

    Oh holy shit! I have a washer & dryer, but if I had to do laundry at a laundromat and someone touched my clothes I would most likely pass out. Or kill someone.

    Reply

    • Fuck My Table
      Dec 24, 2010 @ 11:14:41

      I had to teach my husband to not use our wood cutting board when handling meat. He’s trained to only use vegetables and fruit on that one now. Yeesh.

      Many people don’t understand cross contamination. I don’t know why more people don’t end up in the ER.

      Reply

      • Fuck My Table
        Dec 24, 2010 @ 22:15:11

        My husband’s quite intelligent and EMT trained. How the hell he didn’t know not to use a wood cutting board for meat…well, I’ll never figure that one out. But then again, I’ve seen crazier things…

        I think those of us in food service take for granted that everyone knows safe food handling practices. Sometimes I nearly pass out at the things I see going on in other people’s kitchens.

        Reply

  8. thelifeofjamie
    Dec 24, 2010 @ 09:08:45

    I thought of another one…a big one! When I was pregnant, I was going to kill people, random strangers, who would touch my belly. I made it through 2 pregnancies with only one assault each- but both were by people I don’t know!

    I don’t know how many people I slapped for touching my belly when I was pregnant with my daughter. What the hell is up with that? I’m not Budda so stop rubbing my belly for good luck. When I was pregnant with my son I just growled at everyone all the time. No one came close to touching my belly.

    Reply

  9. beckyb26
    Dec 24, 2010 @ 10:44:09

    Dirty boy smell. You have a son, I’m sure you know what I mean. I have 2 disgustingly unclean brothers and if I ever date a guy that has an apartment that smells even remotely like dirty boy, I end the relationship.

    I’ve always insisted that my kids shower daily, so there was never any dirty boy smell, but one year my son played hockey and wow! Talk about stink. Hockey player smell is enough to induce vomiting.

    I also hate when people floss in public. Isn’t that a private thing people in front of the bathroom mirror, with no others present? I lived with a woman once that would floss while watching television at night before bed. Ew.

    I hate those little floss sticks I find on tables. Seriously?! Wrap that shit in a napkin and take it with you or wait until you get in your car. Barf.

    Reply

  10. Anton
    Dec 24, 2010 @ 17:34:20

    I am grossed out to no end when people let their children touch everything and then me. I don’t like children in the first place and the weird milky smell of children makes me gag. But having their slimy, grubby, dirty hands on me, on my glass or something I’m going to use – kill me now.

    Kids are little walking bacteria infestations and should carry around their own bottle of bleach. I hate seeing kids in the store with dirty hands and faces since I know they are touching the cart I’m going to use on my next trip in the store.

    Reply

    • Summn
      Jan 06, 2011 @ 12:13:42

      Yes! Children exude some sort of slime from their skin, I swear! They’re always sticky and smelly, gag! I want to murder people who let their kid (OR DOG!) grope me. Just because YOU are fond of that thing, don’t assume the rest of the world is too. It’s the responsibility of the parent/dog owner to control it. Dogs off leash upset me too, because I suspect they’ll try to lick my hands or rub my genitals, but moreso because loose dogs kill cats, and sometimes even humans. Your pet’s fun does not trump society’s right to safety. If someone lets their dog in the kitchen, &/or pets it while working in the kitchen, I turn anorexic. Uuuugh, stinky, rude, drooly dogs, eugh!

      My kids were C.L.E.A.N. when they were little. My mom used to yell at me because I wouldn’t let them get dirty. Well, I didn’t want their grubby hands pawing me.

      I have dogs…4 big ones…and I refuse to cook for anyone who isn’t okay with dogs in the kitchen. I WILL NOT take food to a social gathering and pass off dog germs on unsuspecting people. My counters and stuff are clean, but let’s face it, dog hair is in the air and not everyone is okay with that.

      Re the carts at the grocer: I will only use the upper part for things like laundry soap, because creepy little toddler & baby asses have been in it! It’s likely held a million of them at the very moment they shat themselves! or sneezed a litre of phlegm! If my husband tosses a bag of candy or fruit up there, I have to exchange it for a “clean” bag.

      Ugh…thanks for telling me something I never even thought of. I feel sick now.

      Reply

  11. leaner
    Dec 24, 2010 @ 22:44:23

    I HATE HATE HATE the smell of children as well. Especially babies when they smell like baby powder or baby oil. Yuck. I hate the smell of diapers and baby wipes. A house that has a baby in it ALWAYS stinks. How can they not smell that?
    I also cannot stand to watch people feed their babies. TOO GROSS! It literally makes me gag when they scrape the food off the kid’s face with a spoon then shove it back in the kid’s mouth. I’m feeling sick just typing this!

    That’s funny! I used to do that with my kids when they were little and I never thought about how gross it is.

    Reply

  12. TheIdiotSpeaketh
    Dec 25, 2010 @ 07:58:01

    Merry Christmas you Superhero Server! 🙂

    Thanks! Hope your day was great too!

    Reply

  13. DarcKnyt
    Dec 25, 2010 @ 12:47:45

    Being out of work for two years makes me say all KINDS of things I can’t repeat in mixed company, but you’ve covered the peeve of unflushed toilets for me. I have problems with people blowing their nose in public at all, never mind at the table where you will, are or have eaten. And of course, there’s the entire idea of using a public washroom of any kind.

    Nevertheless, have a blessed and happy Christmas Day. We are. 🙂

    Reply

  14. Summn
    Jan 06, 2011 @ 12:50:20

    I recall coming out of a washroom, knowing the water was shut off (I walked to another washroom to clean my hands, but passed the broken one on the way back to the lunchroom)and seeing a stream of people heading straight from there into the breakroom. We have maybe a hundred people in our breakroom. I had a real epiphany that lunch break, watching these dozens of people who I KNEW had used the john & not washed their hands, as they touched the door, the microwave, the water cooler, the salt shakers, &the coffee pot. Since that day I wash my hands very well, then use paper towel over my hands for everything I do between sink and sandwich/apple.

    I think many of us would pass out if we knew who did and didn’t wash their hands. I once watched a sanitation guy hook up the hose from the pump truck to the septic tank and saw ick slop out on his hands. He wiped his hands on a dirty towel and started eating a sandwich in his truck. I had to sit with my head between my knees for quite a while.

    I get sqeamish when a friend who hasn’t ever thought about all the nasty handprints that blanket everything scootches their chair in by grabbing the seat (I bet that NEVER gets sanitized!)(scootching in with no hands isn’t easy, but it’s necessary if you’re gonna have finger food, or look through the little booklets on the table (with drink & dessert ideas) while awaiting the bread basket. Plastic-covered menus can at least be wiped off, but paper menus I treat like they are coated in plague-ridden mucous(because they likely are!).
    Ugh…or if someone just sets their cookie or apple right on a luchroom table or on their desk! SO unhygenic! bleah!

    Women who put their purses on the the restroom floor then on their table are the worst. When they leave I have to clean the toilet germs off the table. Barf.

    Reply

  15. Becca
    Sep 01, 2011 @ 00:46:16

    I was working at a grocery store and i was the cashier, I saw this woman and she was not clean none the less she did not smell good, so she proceeds to MY line and as i ring up her items and tell her the total she REACHES INTO her PANTS literally INTO her pants and underware and pulls her money out from her womanly parts and then i started to gag as she tries to hand me the money i am just standing in shock that she actually thought i was about to take the money from her, i just so happend to look at her hand and she had BLOOD in the beds of her nails and blood on the money! I LITERALLY threw up in my mouth, I ran off and told my manager because that is just disgusting and i refused to take her money, I RAN to the bathroom and washed my hands and arms with practically the whole bottle of soap and germ-x’d like crazy, i couldnt believe what had happened, any time she would come in my manager would make her leave. that is so disgusting and unsanitary, she was also a bigger woman so you know, thinking about it makes me want to vomit!!!!! BLLEECCCHHHH!

    I think that might be the worst story I’ve ever heard. I would have probably puked on her.

    Reply

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