Crisis, One After Another

My son, Little Napoleon, has been annoying me with various near death symptoms stemming from the dog bite he got last week (?) or 10 days ago.  He’s something of a hypochondriac and drives me insane with his constant demand for medical attention.  Every scratch or scrape, cold or flu is a sign that he has cancer or needs a kidney transplant or his spine is broken.  You get the picture.

He’s been staying at a friend’s house about 50 miles from home and he’s sent me regular picture updates of his arm from every angle.  We had lunch last week and the wound site looked fine, but later that night Little Napoleon’s friend called me at work to tell me he was dying and they were going to the ER.  NO FREAKING WAY.  I insisted they get some home remedies at Walmart and call it good.  The next day things were fine.

But then Little Napoleon’s wrist started hurting and he couldn’t move his fingers.  This went on for a day or two before I finally told him to go to the Express Clinic and STFU about it.  He went this afternoon and by 4 o’clock, they were admitting him to the hospital for surgery on his wrist and arm.  Apparently, while the wound site wasn’t infected, his wrist was and with some nasty dog saliva virus inducing puss.  Freaking fabulous.

While I was adjusting to the panic of surgery and the self flagellation of being an unfit mother, someone from the Spaghetti Western called and asked if I could come to work, like NOW.  Uh…I live 40 minutes away, but sure.  I was hoping to either trade out my shift or get cut early, but no dice.  The dining room was full and insane until 9 o’clock.  I went on just one screaming crying jag, but only because I had the foresight to give a friend some gas money to drive over and sit with Little Napoleon so he wouldn’t be alone when he woke up, and so she could keep me updated throughout the night. 

This is what a bad mom looks like.

Once I finally got to the hospital, I found my poor little boy in a cast from his hand to his elbow on one arm and from his hand to mid-arm on the other.  He was in pretty good spirits, but I’ll bet that wears off when the pain meds do.  The nurse explained the procedure, but all I heard was “cut open”, “cleaned out”, “packing”, “not stitched up” before I wanted to pass out.  It sounds as if he gets two nights in the hospital with two stages of IV antibiotics before they stitch up the arm and send him home.  I’m surprised it’s going to be with me.

I guess that’s the last time I don’t take his hypochondria seriously.


11 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Heifer
    Jun 15, 2011 @ 04:44:42

    If we took our kids to the Dr. for every little scrape, cut, burn,stomach ache they complain about, we’d all have been hookers by the time our kids were 7 so we could pay the Dr.’s bills. Whatever you need (besides cash of course) we’re here for you.
    Oh, and don’t let our damn Catholic guilt get you down. We can’t change the past

    I would have needed to become a hooker just to pay for the gas if I took Little Napoleon every time he thought he needed to go to the Dr. There have been a few people adding to my Catholic guilt and for a few days I felt pretty bad. Then I talked to my daughter, who knows her brother as well as I do. She said she would have told him to STFU, too and would probably have waited until his arm needed to be amputated. It’s hard to take him seriously.


  2. Rebel
    Jun 15, 2011 @ 06:03:40

    Next time there is a dog-bite related injury just be sure to soak the affected area in epsom salts and water. Other than that and antibiotics the urgent care I went to (used to work at a kennel so had several occasions of dog bites) wouldn’t do anything else. Even when it is a “gaping” wound they won’t do stitches for fear of infection. I have one spot on my hand that should have gotten stitches or at least a butterfly stitch but instead I have a lovely scar.
    Long time lurker, first time commenter. Just because I am that kind of creepy.

    I love that kind of creepy! 🙂 I suppose the first mistake was not getting antibiotics right away. Or maybe the first mistake was assuming he would take care of the bite on his own.


  3. thelifeofjamie
    Jun 15, 2011 @ 07:30:02

    poor kid! I guess a little extra TLC is in order!

    He’s wearing me out on the TLC.


  4. Sherri Cornelius
    Jun 15, 2011 @ 07:34:04

    Aw, poor baby! Sometimes things slip through the cracks. Once my boy hurt his arm in the midst of many days of hurting himself, so I treated it and went on. After a week or so of pain I realized it was possibly broken. I was certain he would be forever disfigured, but he healed up all right. I know you’re going to feel guilty no matter what I say, because that’s what we do. Just don’t beat yourself up about it too long. Hope he feels better soon.

    I’ve heard other parents talk about the neglected broken arm thing. I think they feel as stupid as I do.


  5. skippymom
    Jun 15, 2011 @ 07:56:21

    Oh poor baby – I am so sorry, but glad that he is getting the help he needs.

    Try not to be too hard on yourself – I am sure if you had seen him in person you would’ve taken him yourself – and as a Mom I think we have all done this one time or another. He’ll be fine Momma.

    Take good care of him. And yourself. Hugs!

    Everybody’s good now…except he’s back to hanging out at a friend’s house instead of being at home. I’m going to have to chain his carcass to the bed.


  6. DarcsFalcon
    Jun 15, 2011 @ 12:59:05

    It’s hard living with hypochondriacs, because there’s always that ONE time when their complaints are valid.

    The good news is, he’s being treated and will be back up to 100% in short order. You did what you thought was best with the information you had, so you’re not an unfit mom.

    Now it’s time to de-fang the dogs or make them pay the hospital bills, lol.

    It’s the boy who cried wolf…you panic, then you ignore, then they get eaten.

    Ohhh…de-fanging…there’s an idea! It would be less about fighting and more about gumming each other to death.


  7. izziedarling
    Jun 15, 2011 @ 13:35:13

    Bless your heart – you are not a bad mom. Hope he heals quickly.

    Thank you! He’s on the mend.


  8. Sparty Girl
    Jun 15, 2011 @ 14:14:08

    Oh, gee… poor baby nephew. He’s going to be just fine. If he starts whining remind him about the story of the boy who cried wolf.

    He’s been living that lesson quite a bit lately. If everything wasn’t an emergency, maybe we would have taken him seriously on the dog bite.

    We all have our “bad mother” moments. Look at it as giving him something to talk about in therapy some day.

    My kids should need therapy, but they insist they don’t. I just have them fooled into thinking they are normal.


    Jun 15, 2011 @ 14:51:42


    No lie.


  10. watergirl
    Jun 15, 2011 @ 19:05:31

    He’ll be fine. You’re NOT a bad mom. As SkippyMom said, if you’d seen it in person, you’d have taken him in.

    Most of us have been through that “omg mom I’m gonna DIE” stage with our kids. We peroxide or alcohol them, bandaid them and send them back out to play/work/etc.

    And Rebel is right: epsom salts and water, soak it for awhile. It does *wonders*.

    It works for a number of things. Ingrown cuticles, killing foot odor, nail fungus and athlete’s foot. It adds magnesium and sulfate (via absorption) helps to remove toxins from the body if you add a couple cups of epsom salts to a soaking bath once a week; this also elevates serotonin (the chemical in the brain that lets the body relax) which has the added effect of sleeping better. It increases bloodflow to an extremity (with one of those foot-bath vibrating things). Put a teaspoon of epsom salts with a few drops of iodine into half of a cup of boiling water; snag a cotton ball and it’ll loosen and help to remove blackheads.

    I have a number of medical problems and am a huge believer in “grandma’s home remedies” types of things. While I still have to take some prescriptions, I’ve been able to completely eliminate others by changing the way I live a little.

    I wish I had known about the epsom salt since I have a huge bag in my bathroom cupboard. I didn’t know they were good for so many things. I know now.


  11. DarcKnyt
    Jun 16, 2011 @ 05:47:15

    I know how hard that sort of thing is. I’ve got some pretty heavy guilt on my shoulders where the kids are concerned too. There’s no alleviating it no matter how much encouragement we get from people.

    I’ll say a prayer, and I’m sure he’ll be all right.

    Thank you! He’s doing much better…so much that I can’t keep him home. Isn’t that how it started. The boy needs to be with his mommy.


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