I Blame Pinterest

for the recent spate of home improvement projects that have left me nearly paralyzed.  There was a time when I was content to sit on my ever-widening ass and waste time on the internet.  Then I found Pinterest and all the cool things you can do yourself.  And like any good obsessive compulsive with attention deficit disorder I bought stuff to do four projects at once.

1.  The outdoor faucet.  It froze and broke…oh, I think the first year I lived here, so that would be seven (7) years ago.  Since then I’ve ran a hose from my bathroom for outside water because that’s so much easier than fixing the damned faucet.  Cost to fix:  $34.  Time to fix:  a little over an hour.  Worst part of the job:  crawling under my house with all the spiders.  At least it was cool.

2.  The dog fence.  I have built fence after fence after fence, and the little bastards tear it down, jump over it, or dig under it.  It seems I’ve spent most of my life (and money) building fence.  Last summer I bought a few hog panels (heavy duty metal wire, 5 feet tall and 16 feet long, that not even hogs at feeding time can tear down) to see if they would work.  No sense in spending a shit ton of money on yet more fencing material that allows my dogs to run free.  In a year, the dogs weren’t able to dig under, jump over, climb, or tear down the hog panels so I bought more.  Cost to fix:  $220.  Time to fix:  all damned day.  In the heat.  Worst part of the job:  I’m cut in a thousand places from the old wire.  I’ll probably get tetanus and die.

3.  My deck steps.  No matter which steps I use, I’m taking my life in my hands every time I go up or down.  The back steps are completely rotted out and the front steps are missing boards.  It looks like rednecks live here.  I bought 2x6s to fix the risers, and 2x12s to replace the supports.  Fixing my steps and painting them is my Thursday project, and I will post pictures when they are finished.  Cost to fix:  $40  Time to fix:  this project involves power tools and measuring.  I’m sure there will be cussing, too.  It could be days.  Worst part of the job:  the aforementioned power tools and measuring.

4.  While at the lumber yard picking up supplies for my steps, I scored some free pallets.  Yes, most people view these as junk, but again I blame Pinterest.  There are a thousand things you can do with pallets, but since I have a short attention span, I’m going to build a bench, and since I’m obsessive compulsive, I’m going to build 6 or 10 of them.  Plus, one of the pallets would make the cutest gate for my front yard (oh yeah, the old wire that’s still in good condition is going around the front part of my yard.  I don’t have one yard.  I have a dog yard, a duck yard and a cat yard.  Nothing’s simple here.)

Fucking Pinterest.

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6 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Squiggy's mom
    Jul 24, 2012 @ 01:26:14

    Hey, you’re doing great! 7 years ago I removed the switch plates from the bathroom and bedroom because I had bought nice wooden ones, and was going to paint them to match the walls. They’re still in the garage. Pallets don’t get enough respect!

    Let’s not talk about switchplates or outlet covers, okay?

    Reply

    • Squiggy's mom
      Jul 30, 2012 @ 18:22:21

      Don’t be insulted – that’s just the tip of the iceberg that’s my “if I don’t get this taken care of soon I’m in deep shit” list. Like the dry rot in the sill timbers. And the laundry room walls that have creeping charlie creeping in, and a ceiling that I worry about caving in after each heavy downpour. A garage floor that’s beginning to look like a jigsaw puzzle. Get the picture? I mentioned the switch plate covers because one would think that I could at least get such a simple thing done. One would be wrong.

      I wasn’t insulted, I meant I have no outlet covers or switchplate covers because I started to replace them about 10 years ago. They are easy to forget about until you go to switch on a light and shock yourself. Arg!

      Reply

  2. Becki
    Jul 24, 2012 @ 05:28:05

    I am so glad to hear I’m not the only one….

    I heard it was addictive, but I never imagined it would be like this.

    Reply

  3. Sparty Girl
    Jul 24, 2012 @ 06:37:08

    Hahahaha! Just like homeowners everywhere… Good luck with the measuring.

    I plan to use the old boards as templates. How can that go wrong?

    Reply

  4. Bob
    Jul 24, 2012 @ 06:45:44

    I need a couple of pallets. I have been thinking of picking up a couple from the side of the road but I am afraid I might be “stealing” them.

    You have pallets on the side of the road?! *gasp* I’d be doing midnight runs for pallets.

    Reply

  5. DarcsFalcon
    Jul 24, 2012 @ 21:52:09

    Hahahaha! Pinterest is like crack. But at least you’re getting some stuff done, right? I can’t wait to see your pics … so I can Pin them, naturally. 😉

    Reply

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