Cast of Characters
I know you have questions, such as, ‘Who the hell are these people?” Stay tuned as I add stories and descriptions. Stories are listed oldest first.
THE OUTLAW STAFF
Bagheera (aka Sharron)–Owner, restaurant manager, and straight guy to my funny. She is kind and patient and keeps the Outlaw running.
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Speedy Gonzales–Possibly the hardest working employee ever, but she would bitch if she was hanged with a new rope.
THE COWBOY STAFF
King Triton (aka Big Jim)–Owner, historian, author. He delights in telling stories to customers and playing poker on Friday nights.
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Foghorn Leghorn (aka MDFR)–“Ah say…Ah say…” The only resemblance is the accent and the ability to repeat nonsensical phrases over and over without realizing it. The two most common phrases are, “The same of it is…” and “Right here in the now.” He can talk for hours without saying much more than those two phrases.
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The Dormouse–An on-call employee, married (obviously) mother of 4 very nice grown up kids. Plays in a band with Johnny Bravo and Drizella’s husband.
“I Fell Down and Daddy Got Mad”
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Tinkerbell–Eeyore & Doc’s daughter, sweet, easy to get along with, and funny.
FLYING ASS MONKEYS–Regulars, who are ALWAYS at the bar.
Johnny Bravo–Plays in a band with The Dormouse and Drizella’s husband. Married, father of (at least) 3, rumoured to be having an affair with Drizella. Bears a striking resemblance to Stuart Townsend and always has several groupies following him around.
The Groupies–They consist of Johnny Bravo’s parents, his wife, his Baby Mama, his best friend, and whoever else wants to tag along.
Cartman–(no longer) “Works” for the town, all around lazy, knows everything except how to say no.
ADIOS, ASSHOLE-People who are, thankfully, no longer employed.
Eeyore–Doc’s much older wife, King Triton & Bagheera’s daughter-in-law, Tinkerbell’s mother. Cries all the time.
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Bullwinkle (aka Ding Dong)–37 years old, single mother of 1, permanently living in La La Land (not the one located in California).
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Ursula–The most wretched, haggard, old bitch I’ve ever met.
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Betty Boop Booze–Drunk all the time and a major thorn in my side. One of these days the sound of her laugh is going to make me claw out my eyeballs and shove them in my ears.
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Doc–King Triton & Bagheera’s son, Eeyore’s much younger husband.
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Drizella–Married to Johnny Bravo’s best friend, widely rumoured to be having an affair with Johnny Bravo. Snotty, rude, and hard on the eyes.
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Davey–Single father of 1, good hearted, but every day is a mystery.
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Shaggy–Betty Boop Booze’s boyfriend, an on-call employee. Generally polite and friendly, but completely clueless. 
Do You Do That at Home? 
May 28, 2012 @ 08:36:10
Thank you for this. It’s hard to tell the players without a program!
You mean score card. The more stories a person has, the shorter their life expectancy becomes.
Jun 09, 2012 @ 19:50:46
What about the cast of characters for the Harribalsac and the Spaghetti Western? Do they lose their spot on the cast of characters when you change jobs?
People DO read the archives (hint, hint)… 🙂
I love your awesome stories.
I never did a cast of characters for either of those places. I started with the Harribalsac, but people kept quitting or getting thrown in jail so it was hard to keep a head count of who was still employed day to day.
As for the Spaghetti Western, someday I’ll tell some stories, but for now I’m still simmering.
Jun 12, 2012 @ 00:39:12
Okay then! This helps quite a bit! Thanks. 🙂
Jun 15, 2012 @ 21:37:13
Oh, I see now. This helps me keep things straight. Thanks!
It’s always best to have a program.